Women!!

Imagine receiving a call from a good friend in the late hours of the night and they ask you in a tense voice to come over immediately and bring with the following supplies;

• Black garbage bags
• Duct tape
• Lots of acid
• An electric saw

My immediate thought would be that a tree has fallen into his swimming pool and it needs to be sawn up, bagged and the ph rectified in the pool, right?

Apparently not.

For the sake of this conversation lets assume that Jill called and upon arriving at the house in my lumberjack pajamas, I was informed that Jack had taken ill. She led me to the dining-room, past the patio where to my surprise I discovered that the pool was sparkling and devoid of branches, most confusing indeed. We cam across Jack and I could tell he was far from well by his inability to return my greeting or acknowledge my presence, the pool of red fluid next to him was not beetroot juice and Jills innocent glances everywhere but at me brought out the alert inner inspector in me.

More confusing was the handle of the knife protruding from between his shoulder blades, there is a slight possibility that he was peeling a stubborn beet and lost focus, what was I missing and more so, what would Sherlock Holmes do?

After a cup of coffee and a slice of chocolate cake, Jill seemed surprisingly chatty and stated that her and Jack had had words earlier and he had admitted to an extramarital affair with the babysittter. She seems to remember that he had interrupted her train of screaming and before she knew it he had stopped talking and twitching.

It was as clear as their swimming pool that she had called me over to assist her with the responsibility of choosing a new babysitter and she no longer wished to involve Jack because of his insistence to adopt a hands on approach with the hired help.I advised her as best I could and departed greeting Jack on the way out.

You may ask what can be learnt from this tale, it seems fair to assume that when a woman tells you bring over a strange array of supplies in the middle of the night, all she really wants is a friend to talk to.

Nite all

African Contracting

I have taken a brief leave of absence from composing words that stir deep emotions and sometimes anger with the occasional dose of joy, not to run off to India to hug a monk in the snow and then stare into a dirty mirror and announcing "I have found myself".

No I was simply in a rut of life overrun with frustration, sprinkled with anger and lightly dipped in anger.
Our industry of onsite engineering quality control is one where you are on the receiving end of abuse, anger and threats, yes similar to marriage except the prospect of occasional intercourse is not an option. For all purposes of logic and sanity, we are pushed to the limits of our capacity as would the mother of three year old twins, we work hard, grunt growl and flex flab and lock heads with contractors who plead innocence and  sometimes beg for one more chance, just one more Ted.
I have seen less begging and negotiating from a  toddler in a toy store. Its a daily occurrence, certain conversations even begin with "How are you today Ted, you look angry". The scowl I have had surgically plastered to my frown is the same I bear when my girls use the words "yummy" and "cute" and "oooh" to describe the bottom feeding lying treacherous slimy badly clothed stealing thugs commonly referred to as teenage boys.

My work colleague Danny, a petite 148kg  6ft3 gentleman has both a tazer and a large stick which when all else fails, are his toys that he will use to escort visitors from my office. He is the gentlest of souls unless you attempt to hold his hand while he driving or insist on a man hug at any time of the day.

So why do we do it?

Its a combination of living an ex-pat lifestyle coupled with guaranteed work for a period and beats an office situation any day. The drives around site, interacting with locals and the beautiful countryside, my amazing cleaning lady who I have trained in making the perfect cuppachino are all plus factors that balance the madness.
Photographic opportunities and working alongside professionals, plus the joy of training new individuals so that they will be able to further their careers and gain valuable experience make it a joy to do what we do.
So without further ado, let me go chase off the elephants from the tree in the bush that is our urinal and until next time . . .

Nite All

More than Coffee

There is a part of me that embraces the single life and single parenting because of the quality time spent with my girls, the time together is so precious that it seems to fly by quicker than a Sunday afternoon.
The fact that we can up and go and breeze into all shops and just chill is perhaps selfish at times but appreciated and adored by the three of us. We do not gladly share this time as it is ours and no we feel no guilt in saying this.
I have my flat or room to myself depending on whether I am in South Africa or Lesotho and the freedom has allowed me to ponder and philosophise about life and where it suddenly turned on me and how I managed to somehow emerge face side up. The positives is that with the help of some amazing friends, family and chemical additives I am still standing.

However, there is another side to all of this.

I live from month to month and as C so rightly informed me, so does most of the population in this country let alone the world. So what am I moaning about this time? Well, it is the reality that I am not invincible, not bullet proof and have taken a fair knock in the past 8 years, I smile, joke and tease a lot yet when I retreat into the privacy of my man cave I ponder on the future and the image I have needs some rainbows, a dawning of Aquarius and a Winnie the Pooh outlook on life. Below I have added a few that seem pertinent to me at the moment;

“Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” 

“Weeds are flowers, too, once you get to know them.” 

“Good judgment comes from experience, and experience - well, that comes from poor judgment.” 

So, where does that leave me, well in survival mode I suppose and yes we are allowed to have a good whinge about life and how we sometimes want to through the towel in, the fact that I am able to rise and go to Work Another Day does not make me James Bond, it just makes me a single parent. Someone who like billions of others gets frustrated, tired and has good days and others where he just wants to get back into bed and hide under the covers.

My Simon finishes school next year and Nicole is 2 years behind, as I do what I can to prepare them for the next adventure in their lives, it has forced me to accept certain realities such as seeing less of them. Being alone and independent has created methods of coping such as hiding our true emotions from others and smiling so that you dont have to face the inevitable "Are you ok?"

So how do I conclude this essay of despair and self pity, well lets just say that I am not alone in it all and there are glimmers of beauty that beckon. So all in all its one of those days where I require more than coffee.




Nite All.