Women!!

Imagine receiving a call from a good friend in the late hours of the night and they ask you in a tense voice to come over immediately and bring with the following supplies;

• Black garbage bags
• Duct tape
• Lots of acid
• An electric saw

My immediate thought would be that a tree has fallen into his swimming pool and it needs to be sawn up, bagged and the ph rectified in the pool, right?

Apparently not.

For the sake of this conversation lets assume that Jill called and upon arriving at the house in my lumberjack pajamas, I was informed that Jack had taken ill. She led me to the dining-room, past the patio where to my surprise I discovered that the pool was sparkling and devoid of branches, most confusing indeed. We cam across Jack and I could tell he was far from well by his inability to return my greeting or acknowledge my presence, the pool of red fluid next to him was not beetroot juice and Jills innocent glances everywhere but at me brought out the alert inner inspector in me.

More confusing was the handle of the knife protruding from between his shoulder blades, there is a slight possibility that he was peeling a stubborn beet and lost focus, what was I missing and more so, what would Sherlock Holmes do?

After a cup of coffee and a slice of chocolate cake, Jill seemed surprisingly chatty and stated that her and Jack had had words earlier and he had admitted to an extramarital affair with the babysittter. She seems to remember that he had interrupted her train of screaming and before she knew it he had stopped talking and twitching.

It was as clear as their swimming pool that she had called me over to assist her with the responsibility of choosing a new babysitter and she no longer wished to involve Jack because of his insistence to adopt a hands on approach with the hired help.I advised her as best I could and departed greeting Jack on the way out.

You may ask what can be learnt from this tale, it seems fair to assume that when a woman tells you bring over a strange array of supplies in the middle of the night, all she really wants is a friend to talk to.

Nite all