Thanks Be to You

In the past 36 hours I have setup a home network Mac system, had a tattoo (a gift from my girls) longed for   a birthday cake and received 2 and thats just the start of it.

It has been a whirlwind of adrenaline a sugarless and chemical free high and emotional shock.
I have loved, been loved, been spoilt, laughed and cried and had an one armed bathed.
I have been driven around a golf estate in a golf cart by Nicole and Simon and gone from complete calm to the verge of screaming like a Williams sister and jumping off in a sheer act of survival. I spent 2 and a bit years in the Army with 18 year olds who were not qualified to pick their noses without adult supervision, but were deemed perfectly capable of operating a rifle with live ammunition and they scared me less than my daughters driving display.

Would I do it again, hell yes, who wants to end up looking like Mickey Rouke who has had so many facelifts that his belly button is now a dimple on his chin?

I cried because my silent birthday wish was for a cake and i was blessed with 2, I had a meal with family and shared coffee with friends. I received over a 100 birthday wishes and was humbled by the kind remarks teasing, for those who took the time to tease, laugh, insult and wish me, bless you for making me a very happy man.

Two years ago I celebrated my first birthday as a separated man and the road towards today has not been laden with chocolate bunnies and midgets wielding toothpicks as spears and matches as flame throwers. It has been a spiritual and emotional journey that has made the Oprah Windfree Show look like an episode of South Park.

So tonight, it is with a tear in my eye and a lump in my throat that I acknowledge each of you and the remarkable role you have played in the lives of Simon, Nicole and myself and humbly thank you all.

  
Nite my special friends.

The Long Wait

I hate the time spent in the waiting area of a doctors room, I have such a phobia of all folk medical because they might find "something". In these times more and more people are being diagnosed with stuff and I have enough stuff thank you very much.

If I had a choice I would never see one again, unfortunately I can't sleep without medication and am on another 4 that enable me to function normally in a very anti-normal world.

So what's wrong you ask? Well, I am tired of being pumped with chemicals and tablets with names so long I couldn't ever remember it. I am exploring after much consoling and encouragement from C and L to visit a homeopath. Initially my mind was a-whirl with images of a bent thin lady in a dark cloak with a crooked nose and eyes that seem to hate each other and thus lurk on opposite sides of her face. She grinds roots and bones and dry organs and smoke emerges from her mortar as she mutters to herself.

So needless to say, if she pointed a scrawny finger at me and smiled ever so slightly, I was running down the road screaming like a baby.

You see, I hate not being in control, I do not fear the unknown as long as I understand it and can rationalise with it. And so I wait, the only patient or victim or donor, like an elephant on a wooden swinging bridge.

And then she appeared, a beautiful lady with brown shoulder length hair and the most comforting smile. She was brilliant, professional and everything I didn't expect. What an amazing positive experience and the chemical reversal process begins.

New day New hope

Night All