New Years Resolutions

It seems a reasonable time to bring up the matter of New Years Resolutions. We have survived January and now the real grind of work, school and life has settled into some sort of routine.

The lady in our reception at work was telling me how exhausted she is, the maddening chaos of getting back into a routine is indeed hard work and stressful. With my girls it is the parents responsibility to buy all the text books and get them covered, stockists ran out and then the re-ordering and running up and down began.

It seems strange that my resolutions are no longer give up beer, exercise, study or save for that special unnecessary yet essential toy.

This year like last year it is simply to survive. That’s it.

Times are tough and recession has hit my industry in a big way and there are times when you are unsure if you will be eating chicken or praying for an invitation to supper from a friend.

As a good friend told me, my situation is not unique and many find themselves in this predicament. The workplace has transformed itself that we very seldom are in the same field of employement that we were 10 years ago.

I have been a Coca Cola Rep, a Safety Rep, A Health Food Rep, A Travel Agent, Been involved in Car Hire, worked for a national magazine and now am involved in the Quality field in Engineering and mining. No I didn’t get paid for the exotic dancing so its not a field of employment.

My take on Darwin is not that we originated from apes, but rather that humans evolve to adapt to and survive their present circumstances. Survival is not negotiable.

When the wheels fall off in my life and I lose hope and my sanity reaches that of Jehovah Witness at a Redneck Wedding, I call out to a very special friend. She knows me better than most and understands my chaos and somehow manages to calm me, focus my mind and encourage me.

In our darkest moments, an angel is sent to be the company we need till we can once again see some light.

Nite All

Journey Back in Time

The Journey to the coast and back begins with my arrival at OR Thambo International Airport. I am packed, my luggage feels heavy, laden with 15 novels for my Mom, a leatherman, cable ties, chewing gum and a torch. I am the Indiana Jones of our era, Dr Ted vs the Open Road.

I have packed a selection of music ranging from Nirvana, Sasha's Dance hits to Sherryl Crow. My underwear is sorted into casual and socialising  and then driving. Have keep it all in place when you driving!

Arrived at the airport, checked in and helped an African Mama load her luggage onto the conveyor, she had one bag just for her hats and it weighed a ton!!!!!

As I entered the mens room, a gentleman smiled at me and said "Welcome to my Office". I smiled and wondered if I was meant to shake his hand? He was the cleaner who had promoted himself to MD of his department, his attitude reminded me of how far we had come as a young Democracy.

Met my cousin, took possession of the Citi Golf and after a brief stop to get some perfume for my Mom, I headed off to JBay.

Upon arrival, I walked into my parents house and met my Dad, who wasn't quite sure who I was.
He looked good, a little confused but fortunately not scared of me.
He didn't really talk to me but kept a wary eye on me. My Mom arrived and gave a kiss and Dad immediately got up and came and gave her a kiss too.

By the next morning, he walked up next to me, whacked me on the shoulder and stood next to me. It was a special moment.
The next morning he was in bed and I went in to greet him and he said "hello Ted" and gave me a kiss. That moments recognition seemed to pass quickly but was so precious.
His Parkinsons should have taken his life many years ago but his incredible stamina and my Moms personal care and love have kept him going.
Today he walked up to me and asked me who I am, I told him I was his son, his baby. He replied that I was a bloody big baby and walked away.

There have been times when I thought I caught a glimpse of who he used to be, I cannot praise my Mom for caring for him 24/7 and refusing to give up. What a woman, what a privelage to call her my Mom and nothing I could ever do could make up for what she has done for Dad.

Nite all

Listen and Support

It is very seldom that I begin writing a blog without having some sort of idea of where I am heading and what it is going to be about. So basically I am asking you to follow or join me as we just touch on 'things' and see where we end up.

I spent the whole of Saturday in bed after having early coffee with a dear friend and my girls, they chatted and laughed and I spent most of my time watching Simonne and Nicole. I seem to doing a lot more of that lately. They are no longer my little girls, they have become little ladies with opinions, real emotions and direction. They have recovered from the initial shock of divorce and have found their feet and accepted what i still battle to comprehend. They have moved on.

They speak of boys, hobbies, plans, future and possible subject choices and career choices. I cannot give them all they want materially and emotionally, I love them so deeply and have a bond I hope will remain forever, but they need female input. its not that they don't get that from their Mom, she loves them dearly. What I am trying to say is that they need role models, they need listeners that aren't necessarily their parents to chat, dream, laugh and vent at. I remember as a kid wanting to be taken seriously and even if I could not get my way, at least just to be heard. We shout them down, laugh at them and sometimes use the phrase that we swore we would never use as parents, 'Not now honey I'm a little busy'.

The world has gone mad, Liverpool are mid table, vampires are the good guys, the Queen is getting Facebook and Justin Bieber is considered sexy. The pace we live at and the pressure place on the youth today at school and by their piers (I almost typed "pears", can you imagine a really aggressive intimidating pear) is ridiculous. When are they supposed to kids? They have Facebook, Mxit, Gmail, chatrooms and texting and access to the whole world slime and grime included. They can Google pedophiles and porn, they can get it all on their cellphones and we seem to have very little we can do to protect them.

This is not a blog that is slating technology, I love technology and accept the good with the evil, I just don't want my girls to be exposed to all of the nasty stuff yet. What is a Dad to do?

The parenting side is basically done, they are 12 and 14 and all the groundwork is complete. All I can add are the odd bits here and there and provide emotional support as they stumble from the nest and face the world head on. I have to let them fall, but can assist in getting them back on their feet and then have to stand back as they venture forth again.

Parenting is as easy as convincing a 2 year old that chocolate and spinach are both good for you. It is an exact science that has basic outlines and lots of grey areas, like George Bush winning the Nobel Peace Award.

So our stroll went somewhere. My head hurts for the fourth day in a row and I must leave you.

Good Nite