Why must I leave?
I am surrounded by love and yet I must walk away and leave it behind for a month.
I dont understand this.
I had given up on love and as such had placed all relationships on hold and guess what happened, yup a lady appeared like the lady from the lake. She appraised me, digested and analysed what she had read and sat before her and decided that they added up. I was unaware that I was being "interviewed" as most guys are. Gentleman, the slightest detail, the manner in which you speak, greet her, listen and even say goodbye is checked and ticked. With most guys, the woman simply has to show up and giggle and we are sold initially.
My girls are blossoming and growing up so quickly and independantly that I am seeing them in the independance and enjoying the personalities, thought processes and the manner in which they assess and judge people and situations.
Essentially they are grown-ups with a need for daddy to be around and be a bouncing board for questions when required.
I can accept that.
As for my Lisa, she makes me feel as if I can love again. I am afraid to believe it is all true because it is so real. A hug, a kiss, holding hands and sharing food, wine and thoughts together. I had accepted that this would never be again and that I was not worthy of love from another. Now that I am faced with it, I want to linger on it, savor it and somehow bottle it and take it back to Lesotho with me. It cannot be expressed in words, there are are too many senses involved.
Gabi is a 6 year old bundle of love that cuddles and giggles and has wormed her way into my heart. Bless you angel.
And yet I must leave and it hurts and tears at my emotions.
I shall return but my ladies await and I must go.
Miss you
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