Spring

Spring.
A new shoot, green and hopeful forces itself to the surface and gazes innocently at its new surroundings.
The environment is not completely hostile, but neither is it friendly.
The difference is that there is hope.

I am at a crossroads in my life where I have journeyed so far, I have battled, sweated, struggled with religion and morals and cried tears of sadness and frustration. Yet I have also discovered a new Ted, one who is more patient, honest, able to listen and shut up when required.
I have the most amazing friends in the world, I have made friends with folk I never see and they have become a part of my circle. Today I will mention a single Mom who is raising her daughter whilst battling to find a job. She has hit rock bottom, sobbed and hid, but she hasn't given up. What an honour to know her and know that when we finally meet for fruit salad and coffee, I will be able to hug her and laugh together.

Then my new friend, shy, funny, cute and a blushing beauty who has exploded into my life, thank you.
You make me smile and believe in a part of my life I had packed away.
I am smiling like a teenager as I write about you, I didn't think this was possible and irrespective of the future, I am happy now.

Spring is on our doorstep, embrace it.
Enter the world with a smile and a bounce in your step and who knows what new doors of opportunity await you.

Nite all.

Tech Free

I am sick and tired of being sick and tired, I am now on round 2 of antibiotics and I can hear all the treehuggers cringe in mock horror. The vegans are covering their pet chickens ears and the carnivores have added more gravy to their lamb chops.

Whatever happened to waking up and bouncing out of bed?
When did 4 of the days of the week feel like Monday and weekends pass quicker than a baked bean through Granddad’s system?

Our glorified rat race has bred a superlinked ultra technological hungry need to know what is happening all the time lab rat, not only can we not escape to peace and quiet, we have convinced ourselves that if we are not contactable 24/7 we might miss something.
Let me relay one of the dangers that has arisen.
When we were children, we would get on our bikes, disappear with our friends and return before dark or face the wrath of Mother. Now the wrath of Mother was far worse that todays equivalent of your Blackberry battery dying at school, or missing a crucial episode of Oprah or even worse,  committing social suicide by going to the mall and Dad decides to skip along like little Red Riding Hood from shop to shop.

We live in a world where appearance and image are placed next to if not higher than godliness, status is the god of our era.
I should add that I am not innocent here, I love technology and there are toys that I have considered giving my good kidney for. A SLR camera, a laptop that works, things that ping and sing, sigh.
Is it possible to withdraw into the 1930’s for a weekend, from a Friday afternoon till a Monday morning with nothing that requires a battery or electricity. Spend time either alone or someone close and sit around a fire at night, read a book, a real book. Lie in a hammock and just listen to life, sip a beverage and forget about life and its worries for a while.

I have to get away from it all, gather my thoughts and decide what is important and what needs to be cut loose so it can drift away.
Anyone keen on a techno-free weekend getaway? Apply within.

Nite All

Tech Free

A Kiss and a Thank You

To say I enjoy discovering who I am and the experiences and insights along the way would not be completely honest.
I am impatient and critical and have the innate ability to analyse situations to death. I also have the compassion and love to care deeply for family and friends, as I do not have a partner I am using this period to try and understand what is happening in my life.

I dreamt the other night of a kiss, the sweet sensual parting of the lips, the gentle engagement and slight gasp as they met. There is an electricity as two forces meet and tongues caress each other like a silk sheet touching your bare skin.
To me there is no more erotic moment than a kiss. It is the baring of one's soul to another, opening a secret door and trusting it will be loved and not shrugged aside.

I see people, study them and their actions. Couples in love, a parent with their children, the way we interact with strangers. I notice that I do not smile enough, compliment enough and at times listen enough.
One of my favourite quotes is that I am "all ears and a little stomach", forgive me if I have heard you and not listened.

Sometimes I just want it to be all about me, I need to be selfish and need affirmation and feel like a kid again.

Thank you for listening.
Thank you for your time.

I am deeply appreciative.

Nite all.
 ee them  

Journey Back in Time

The Journey to the coast and back begins with my arrival at OR Thambo International Airport. I am packed, my luggage feels heavy, laden with 15 novels for my Mom, a leatherman, cable ties, chewing gum and a torch. I am the Indiana Jones of our era, Dr Ted vs the Open Road.

I have packed a selection of music ranging from Nirvana, Sasha's Dance hits to Sherryl Crow. My underwear is sorted into casual and socialising  and then driving. Have keep it all in place when you driving!

Arrived at the airport, checked in and helped an African Mama load her luggage onto the conveyor, she had one bag just for her hats and it weighed a ton!!!!!

As I entered the mens room, a gentleman smiled at me and said "Welcome to my Office". I smiled and wondered if I was meant to shake his hand? He was the cleaner who had promoted himself to MD of his department, his attitude reminded me of how far we had come as a young Democracy.

Met my cousin, took possession of the Citi Golf and after a brief stop to get some perfume for my Mom, I headed off to JBay.

Upon arrival, I walked into my parents house and met my Dad, who wasn't quite sure who I was.
He looked good, a little confused but fortunately not scared of me.
He didn't really talk to me but kept a wary eye on me. My Mom arrived and gave a kiss and Dad immediately got up and came and gave her a kiss too.

By the next morning, he walked up next to me, whacked me on the shoulder and stood next to me. It was a special moment.
The next morning he was in bed and I went in to greet him and he said "hello Ted" and gave me a kiss. That moments recognition seemed to pass quickly but was so precious.
His Parkinsons should have taken his life many years ago but his incredible stamina and my Moms personal care and love have kept him going.
Today he walked up to me and asked me who I am, I told him I was his son, his baby. He replied that I was a bloody big baby and walked away.

There have been times when I thought I caught a glimpse of who he used to be, I cannot praise my Mom for caring for him 24/7 and refusing to give up. What a woman, what a privelage to call her my Mom and nothing I could ever do could make up for what she has done for Dad.

Nite all

Goodbyes and Hello

I parted with my Italian Stallion, my sportscar, my wanna be Vespa today. My Fiat Uno 1100cc has found a new home and we will no longer be the irresistible force any longer.

Gone are the days where my vocal engine sounds drowned out the real engine, where I would make tyre squealing sounds and look at myself in the rear view mirror in a look of amazement and pure joy.

So soon I depart for the shores of the Port of Elizabeth to pursue new adventures, meet old friends I have never met, friends I miss dearly and spend quality time with my parents. Alas Matt we cannot share that beverage I was so looking forward to, next time my friend.

My Dad has very advanced Parkinsons and there is very little chance he will even recognise me. My Mom has stood by his side faithfully and looked after him and cared for him as if he is a baby.
I am proud to call them my parents and even though I haven't seen my Dad for over 3 years, I know it will be hard to see him now.

I will be driving the 1100km back next Monday and will use the time to contemplate the past 2 years and determine the path for the year ahead.
The open road, good music and an overactive imagination, how much trouble could I get into haha.

So I am hoping that the Dark Ages are behind me and the Season of Light is about to dawn. I have packed sunglasses just in case.

Nite All