I have to state that this eating 3 times a day 7 days a week does not agree with my budget in the slightest.
Milk is cow juice and cows eat grass that grows everywhere for free!
Why the heck does it cost so much and all its by products like butter, cheese and cream are not aluminium plated or wrapped in newspaper.
Have you had slight tremors and held your breathe as the teller rings them up with the passion of a serial terrorist bomber heading off to lala land.
Then the shock!
You fight back the tears and hand over your little plastic card and religiously chant as you wait for the machine to dial your bank. Please go through please go through.
I have a theory that more prayers are said at check out counters than any churches or religious centres. What does God do when He gets this flood of prayers and checks his Godberry to confirm that it is not in fact Sunday 09h30 but a weekday at 17h30?
I can only afford to have supper on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and every alternate Sunday. Judging by my above average waist, minute compared to Sumo wrestlers, it may be assumed I steal from orphanages on the other days.
A friend told me to floss carefully and then hang the dental floss out to dry. The little string of flossbits apparently provide substantial protein for that last week before payday.
I do believe I have just lost my appetite.
Nite all.
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