I arrived home after work tired, irritable and basically miserable. It had been a tough day and I was finished.
This in itself is not a problem except I had my two girls waiting for me, excited, hungry and with tons of words they needed to use before they expired and disappeared forever.
So I did what any sensible rational single parent still new to the game would do, I jumped up and down in a tantrum of frustration and selfishness and demanded me-time and silence and a cooked meal. Actually I got hold of a good friend and her advice was simple, suck it up, get over it and love your kids.
You see I never realised the pressure single parents find themselves under, the sheer exhaustion when all have gone to sleep and the washing of dishes and clothes that never seem to end. Its Survivor - The Single Parent!
I love my kids more than life itself and will do whatever it takes to do what has to be done. I will do without and sell possessions if required, but I am human and have to admit that you have to dig deep some days. Life is tough. It isn't fair. And when you're down there seems to be a queue of people waiting to put the boot in. I had a tough day at work and some things were said that were not necessary and it put a real damper on my day. I need to exercise and am wondering if i can find the time let alone the energy to get started. It all takes time and effort doesn't it?
But and yes there is a but, there are moments of unbelievable joy, love and laughter that more than make up for all of this.
My girls have passed out next to me and the flat is dead quiet. It is peaceful and as I listen to their rhythmic breathing I know there is nowhere else in the world I would rather be.
Good Nite All
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